Hello, I just recently turned 30 years old and am in the process of being officially diagnosed with PCOS. I have known for a very long time that there was something wrong with me, and it is almost a relief at this point to know that I was right.
After I started to have cycles, when I was 11-years-old, I noticed that my brain had somehow changed. I could no longer focus on things that I was doing, I couldn’t concentrate for anything, and I would lose interest in anything incredibly fast. But I had never been that way before. I was a straight-A student, I loved school, and oddly enough, I loved doing my homework. Since my cycles started though, I have never been the same. I constantly fight the feeling of “brain fog,” and I feel my brain is slipping more every day. You know it is bad when you have to change the sentence you started because your brain can’t recall the right word you wanted to use. Or you prefer to just stay quiet in a debate among friends because you know your brain can’t keep up fast enough with the group. Or you’re afraid that you will stutter again in your attempt to rush your thoughts to keep up.
On top of that, the body hair… ugh, the body hair. I have it everywhere. My stomach, my back, my fingers, my toes, all over my face, my chest… I mean, you name it, hair is there. It may not be the thickest or the darkest, but it’s there. My mother, thankfully, dealt with body hair like me, so she tried to help the best she could. She bought me tweezers and showed me how to use them. She helped me with hair removal creams, waxing, bleaching the hair, and shaving. She even bought me a package of hair remover for my face and neck, which in the end, didn’t really work that well. I was always so self-conscious. I would worry about what shirts I would wear, so people wouldn’t see the hair. I would pluck my face at least a few times a week, and any time I had a boyfriend, I would try to hide things as much as I could. The worst is the hair around my nipples, which I feel no one talks about! How embarrassing–you go to be intimate with your partner, and you have to worry about the last time you plucked your nipple hairs. Was it yesterday? A couple days ago? Have new ones grown in since then?!
I just went to the doctor the other day for yet another ultrasound, since I am still having issues with ovulating and periods. Apparently, I now have a cyst about the size of my uterus. We are waiting it out for a month to see if it decreases in size or if I will need to have surgery to remove it. In the meantime, I had to tell my boss that if I pass out because it ruptures, he will need to have me taken to the hospital and call my husband. Oh joy!
And as I write this on a dreary Sunday, all I have done today is lie around and sleep because I can’t seem to get the energy to do anything, when I have a million things to get done before the work week starts. Ugh…
Sorry for the bouncing around in this post. I am just trying to wrap my mind around everything, and I am so frustrated with the situation, as I am sure all of us are. It’s just nice to come to a place where I can see others discussing their situations and trying to help each other. Thank you all for being so strong and brave and willing to help others through it all. You all are amazing, and I hope to get to know you all better and help as many people as you do!
The informational content of this article is intended to convey a personal experience and, because every person’s experience is unique, should not be relied upon as a substitute for professional healthcare advice.
This story is intended to convey a personal experience and, because every person’s experience is unique, should not be relied upon as a substitute for professional healthcare advice.
I am so sorry for the pain that you have had to endure. Stay strong.