Friday, December 6, 2019
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One Who Should Not…

A soft beanie slips over the small head

of one who should not be hairless

A needle plunges into the hip bone

of one who should not know that kind of pain

A single word scares

one who should not yet know true fear

Thoughts beyond this world float in the mind

of one who should not have to wonder what it feels like to die

Memories of a past life escape the conscience

This is normal, right?

Everyone gets chemo…

Everyone must fight for each day…

Everyone must endure the acrid taste of Prednisone as it skims the back of their throat…

Everyone must search each cell in their body for the energy to turn over in bed…

It’s impossible to imagine that the world goes on

lives go on…

while yours crumbles beneath your shaking feet

Why have you been chosen?

Only God knows…

How hard must you fight?

There is no certainty in the mouths of doctors…

What will happen?

Only time has the ability to speak those words…

Unanswerable questions to an unanswerable disease

Being a cancer kid is but a bitter honor…

Slowly “courage”, “strength”, “hope”, and “fight” shed their definition and gain a new one

You learn how to battle,

and you learn how and when to give up

You learn how to laugh through pain,

and smile through struggle

Happiness…the single most sought after thing in existence…

you learn how to stop seeking it and instead create it,

even in circumstances in which it is thought unsustainable

You learn independence,

yet that sometimes you must fully let go and lay your life in the arms of another

You realize the brittle, fragile nature of life,

and work to gently cradle it

You discover that a clock is of no value,

numbers fade and blend until only one second remains…now

What’s in that moment and how to handle it is of your own doing…

That which cannot be chosen might have chosen you,

but moment to moment it is you who has the choice

Tucked into the starchy sheets of a hospital bed,

one’s mind delves beyond the ceiling tile that has been stared at for an hour…

Never before had you been forced to stop…

and granted time to ponder what others step over every single day

This article is intended to convey general educational information and should not be relied upon as a substitute for professional healthcare advice.

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4 comments

  1. Fight Like A Girl : Honor Hersh

    Thank you..Thanks for showing me what my daughter may feel or think but can’t tell me. Most adults could not express this as well

  2. God Bless you one and all. You are truly a very courageous soul, I too am battling cancer. I was diagnosed in March of 2011 and had surgery in April. I’ve started chemo in June and so far so good…. god bless you and you will be in my prayers.

  3. God Bless you one and all. You are truly a very courageous soul, I too am battling cancer. I was diagnosed in March of 2011 and had surgery in April. I’ve started chemo in June and so far so good…. god bless you and you will be in my prayers.

  4. thanks you ……………….

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