Saturday, November 28, 2020
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One More Round

You’re in a boxing ring. You’re throwing punch after punch. You’re winning. You feel that rush that for that moment you’re on top. Just when you think you’ve got your opponent beat, it comes around with a left hook that catches you off guard and completely off balance. Your neck snaps around, your ears are ringing, and everything around you is blurry as the dizziness hits. In what feels like slow motion you fall backwards. You lay there reminding yourself to breathe half wondering if you’re still alive. In the distance you hear the ref counting “1…2…3…”. He sounds so far away and the lights above seem too bright. You roll to your side struggling to get up, “4…5…6…” You make it back to your feet just before he times you out. You’re struggling to breathe. You look across the ring at what you thought you had beat and suddenly it seems so much bigger. You wonder how you’ll throw the next punch, how you can keep standing, how you’re ever going to win.

Over the past few weeks this has been me. I’ve fought as hard as I possibly can and now for the first time in a while I feel like I’m just barely standing, with my ears ringing, my head dizzy, and wondering how I’ll take the next step forward. Two weeks ago I had my fourth surgery in three and a half years. The results were not good. I lost one of my tubes, and the endo has been so aggressive that it has went past just being on my organs or on my stomach cavity walls, or pelvic cavity walls. It is now deep into my tissue and on my nerves. Hence the horrible, out of control pain I was in the ER for on Monday.

So now I am faced with having to start Lupron in the next few weeks. It’s one treatment I’ve honestly tried to avoid for the past few years. But I no longer have a choice. Which is something that frustrates me the most. Being out of control of your body is one of the worst feelings there is, and not having that control for going on 6 years gets harder every time.

I know this is not the normal kind of article I write, and I apologize for this kind of being all about me. But I, deep from my heart, ask you to keep me, my husband, and my family in your prayers as every  choice that is made not only affects me but them too.

If you have ever been on Lupron, how did you do? Did it help? How were the side affects?

Keep fighting my brave sisters, even when you feel like you can’t get up and the ref is getting closer and closer to ten, don’t time out. Keep going. We’re all around the ring cheering you on.

Hugs and pain free wishes!

Rachel

The informational content of this article is intended to convey general educational
information and should not be relied upon as a substitute for professional healthcare advice.

This article is intended to convey general educational information and should not be relied upon as a substitute for professional healthcare advice.

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8 comments

  1. Rachel,

    I just stumbled upon your blog looking for a support group for endo. A brief summary of my last 2 years: June of 2010 I became extremely ill. My blood pressure and blood sugar were all over the place. My potassium kept dropping for no reason, my thyroid was giving me issues, I had heart palps that scared the daylights out of me, I was sooooooo dizzy I couldn’t walk through doorways without bruising myself, I was having panic attacks (something new to me). I had episodes of flushing, hotflashes and sometimes vomiting so badly I had to go to the hospital to get it under control. I went from a healthy (for my size) 125 pounds down to a scary 87 pounds…I was terrified!! What was wrong with me!?!?! Three different reputable hospital systems couldn’t figure it out. I was crazy they said…anorexic they claimed….sleep deprived they suggested…taking street drugs they thought…abused by my family they accused. I was at my wits end. I’m sure you have guessed by now since this is an endo forum that alas…I finally figured out after the pain kicked in and I found a good OB GYN that it was endo. PAIN was actually one of the last things to punch me. Endo can do wicked crazy things. I was off work for 4 months, and it took me over a year and a half to get all my strength back (and I still am weaker then when it all began). I ended up going to Mayo Clinic for my endo. Their recommendation – Lupron….not what I wanted to hear. I had surgery first and they concluded that the endo left over was too small and was attached to places where cutting was not an option and that the only option was Lupron. So I moved forward with it and I want to share my experience so far. I started with a one month dose. It was easy breezy. I was a little nauseous immediately after the shot but that could have been nerves =). I did get what they call a ‘surge’….a very painful period about 2 weeks after that shot was administered. Other than that, zero side effects! The next step was the 3 month shot. I am one and a half months into that. I can tell you this….hot flashes suck! They do happen and they are crappy. BUT I can also tell you this: my periods no longer haunt me. My dizziness is waaaaay better! My stomach symptoms have for the most part regulated. My weight is becoming healthier. I no longer have panic attacks (or even half the anxiety I had before the shots). I can tell the shot is working. Other blogs said I’d be achy. I am, but I am 30 and have been achy since I was 20. They also said fatigue is a side effect. Again, this symptom is better with the shot than before it. Overall, I do hate the hot flashes and sometimes they make me nauseous because they are so strong, But they pass. I no longer worry that I’m dying. I feel human again!! I feel 20 years older than I should but I will take that over feeling like I’m on my death bed. Every person will handle the drug differently. From the forums I read before I started Lupron I thought I was in for a doozy, but I keep this in mind: With what I have been through that has not killed me, I am strong enough to get through this like it’s nothing. I pray each time the injection is administered that God will please direct the medicine to the endo and to protect the healthy parts of my body from any negative side effects the drug can cause. Stay positive, have faith, and keep fighting!

    • i to have the joys of what u guys have but no surgery for it. my periods r very bad and have always been that way. because of my crohns i had a hole in my bowel which leaked bile allover my insides. i had bowel surgery but my periods were really off. i went to get a ultra sounds and found a ten pound cyst on my right overy crushing it. because im not married or ready for kids my biggest fear is not that i only have one overy every ach scares me and im always worried about another cyst . my doctor put me on lupron and yes it was ur nerves, the shot is big looking but its to go into ur muscle. i can let u know ive been on and off it the last few yrs and trust me ur periods get so much better, the pain is less and all i need is a heating pain instead of pain pills now for the pain. id wear a pad the first 3 months cause u get spotting and yes the hot flashes such big time. im not sure if christina got this but i noticed that i got more emotional as well not angry but ur temper is a little shorter, u sweat out of now where and id cry a the dumbess things lol. but its worth to have things under control. i went to my doc and told her that this was going on so she put me on a menopause pill to help the hotflashes and everything else like she told me ur not really in menopause but lupron tricks ur body into thinking it is and if you have any worries about having a family later i was told its not hard to get ur body to get periods again but the pain will come back. i hope this helps good luck

      • Thank you! Reading what you said did help. I’m so glad to know of women that it worked for and helped instead of all the bad you hear. Thank you again it was so encouraging 🙂
        <3 Rachel

    • Thank you so much for sharing! It truly encouraged me. I have been doing much better than I expected and am getting ready for my second injection later this week. Thank you once again!
      <3Rachel

  2. I truely Wish the doctors would listen to those of us suffering with endo. Lupron only makes it Worse!

  3. I have been battling endometriosis for years now. I have already had 1 surgery lost 1 fallopian tube and 1 ovary. Within 6 months the pain was back. I’m sure there will be more surgeries to come. I’m happy that I found this site it let’s me know that I’m no alone. Thank-you.

    • Oh Kimberley I know what you’re going through and how hard it is. You are NEVER alone! If you ever need someone to talk to feel free to email me or one of the other wonderful ladies here at FLAGC.
      <3 Rachel

  4. all lupron seemed to do for me is give me hot/clod flashes i did find something that helps from my mom she had been taking doTERRA oils for her diabetes and she say there is oils for endometriosis i said the dr have not been able to help i was getting ready to have my 3rd surgery in 3 years y not try and see if it works at that point i was taking pain pills like they where candy the oils are amazing and within 2 weeks was almost pain free i also had a few friends that have been on it and one just had a baby and one is on the way the oils are amazing and i am glad my mother told me about them I am know telling my stories as well as a few others I have also started helping my mother sell it as I know it works for me and others I know it was not something I thought would work but it did and it has changed my life for the better

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