I’m 21 years old, and I have been fighting a really bad spine problem since I was 12. When I turned 12, I took one step out my front door and my lower back fell apart. My L5 S1 shifted and it shattered. The hospitals left me like that for 3 years, then finally they fused my lower back and put pins in it. A year goes by and I’m still in a lot pain. So I ended up going back in for x-rays and they found bone spurs growing into my spinal cord. They found at least 6 or 7. So after that they had to do another surgery to remove them and when they removed them they took out my hardware in my back. My last back surgery I had I was when I was about 16. It has been a few years now and I have no medical coverage. I’ve been fighting as hard as I can to get SSI. As of right now I have a bulging disc and a slipped vertebrae. The pain is getting so bad that I don’t want to keep fighting.
No hospital will help me. I have been turned away so many times that I just feel like I’m not worth the help. I live at home with my family: my mom, stepdad, little sister and my big brother. My big brother is 32; he has cerebral palsy. He’s in a wheelchair. My mom is getting older, so even with all my pain, I push myself to keep helping my family. In my eyes, if I’m helping my family, doing the right thing, and I lose my legs from helping my family, then it’s okay because I was doing it for the right reasons.
Everyday I’m afraid to walk. I just want to live my life as a ‘normal’ 21 year old woman does, but I can’t. I actually went out for the first time in a few years to try and have fun. I went out to my first bar. I had a lot of fun but I don’t think I’ll be going again anytime soon, which sucks.
A family friend told me to check this site out. I hope a little bit of my story can help someone else. I know the type of person I am, so if anyone needs help or someone there in their life, I’d love to be that person. But I don’t know what to do anymore. I really don’t want to keep going. I don’t. It’s sad to say, but I just want to end it all. But I won’t. I’ll keep fighting. That’s my story for now.
Lindsey
California
Submitted 7-1-2012
The informational content of this article is intended to convey a personal experience and, because every person’s experience is unique, should not be relied upon as a substitute for professional healthcare advice.
This article is intended to convey general educational information and should not be relied upon as a substitute for professional healthcare advice.